Uh, duh!

So I realized my trouble, which I actually realized in a professional development session a year ago but didn't act upon as aggressively as I should have: I am doing the wrong job for my organization. If being in my role means devoting most of my time to the administrative and governance stuff that I've spent so much energy on in the last year, then it's not a role to which my skills are best suited, it's enervating and de-motivating, and I'm at the point where it's become critical for me to stop doing it. If my role can be redefined to focus primarily on program development, project management and being the public ambassador and spokesperson for the organization and our values, then I can totally do that, because it's what I do very well and what gives me joy and energy and passion and the desire to get up in the morning. Mind you, I completely recognize the need for someone to do the other stuff, because it is critical to the organization's maintenance and growth. We just have to figure out how to find that person muy pronto, and free me up to do what I ought to be doing if I'm going to be at all productive in the short- or long-term future.

Plotting, plotting ...