In preparation

I'm currently celebrating the end of a very busy, very productive and very positive summer. There's been travel, good food, exercise, family time, friend time, career development, and a good bit of R&R. Honestly, I long for the days of my phone that made my want to blog all the time (HTC, I miss you!) ... somehow, my Blackberry seems all business and not quite enough play. Well, that's not quite true; I play XXL Gems and Facebook all the time, but the urge to write out my thoughts at length feels incompatible with my current keyboard.

Digression. The real point I was ambling toward is that there's so much I want to write about, because the summer has been amazing. But the thing that struck me most today is how clearly I can see the path that has been leading up to this really cool point in my life. That's not always the case with me; there are many things that God has worked on in my life that I didn't understand until much, much later, and quite a few that I don't yet get. But at this moment, all these threads are coming together in a pattern that is crystal clear - and very beautiful.

It hit home this afternoon in the bathroom (where I do all my best thinking, of course). I'd just taken a break from the mind-numbing task of starting to clean up a mailing list database at my new job. The task made me want to scratch my eyes out a little; but then I thought how cool it is to have this job that makes such full use of all my skills - from the big ones like strategic thinking to the seemingly little ones like database design and management. As much as the thought of sifting through those 6,000 records was daunting, I appreciated being able to do it, and being able to plan for how to improve our database design to help make these tasks easier in the future.

I can't describe how much I love my new job; it's like a puzzle piece that exactly fits to make the picture complete, only I didn't even realize it was missing until it came along. The story of my hire is definitely one of those you-find-it-when-you're-not-looking events (as much as I hate that phrase in other contexts): a connection from my summer fellowship gave my name to the organization, as did another person within the organization; I got an email about coming in for an interview the morning after I'd even heard that I'd been suggested for the position; and within the month, I was hired. I hadn't been planning on looking for a job until next year, I hadn't thought that I wanted to work in nonprofit management again for a while ... and I even realized, after looking back through some emails in the spring, that I'd ignored an earlier heads up from a friend about the fact that the position was opening up, because I didn't think I wanted a job like this at the moment. But when the opportunity came back around again - thank God! - it was so obvious how perfect a fit it is for me right now, that I can still hardly believe I've been so blessed.

It feels weird to insert a bulleted list in the middle of a rapturous story, but it's the clearest way I can think of to illustrate all the large and small ways that this job is so just-right:

• My last experience with nonprofit management was stressful to say the least, and I really didn't want to go back to the nonprofit world for a while. Or so I thought; it turns out that what I didn't want was not to have to deal with the crazy stressful aspects of my former job. My new job is everything I loved about my old job (working on design and planning, social responsibility, travel, collaboration, public speaking, writing, graphic design, organizing panels and forums, having autonomy and flexibility), minus the things I didn't (board management, finance and accounting, fundraising), plus the supportive work environment I really needed.
• My first interview was like the best first date ever. :D Example: as my new boss explained all the reasons why he had started the award program in the first place, I was thinking in my head, "I don't have to give you my rant on architecture awards, because you just gave it for me!" And then my fabulous predecessor began explaining all the people they'd been partnering with over the years and the new relationships they hoped to build; it was a list of all the people I either already loved working with from my last job or was already dying to partner with sometime soon. When I was finally hired, I had to remind myself to stay on vacation for the couple of weeks between the end of my fellowship and my start date, because I was so eager to get into my new role.
• One of the things I loved about my summer fellowship was the fact that I could walk to work every day; it was so much fun, and I loved getting in that extra bit of exercise. I kept thinking about how wonderful it would be to have my permanent job within walking distance, but I thought I couldn't possibly restrict my job search to within a mile of my house. Lo and behold: my new job is exactly a mile from my house, and a mere two blocks from where I was working all summer. I still love the walk just as much as ever!
• Speaking of my summer fellowship, I was actually awarded two this summer, and when I first started interviewing for the job, I was trying to figure out when to schedule the second one sometime during the upcoming year. It was my one hesitation about taking the job; how could I start a new job, and then tell them that I needed three months off within my first year to go work in Washington, DC for a bit? And alternately, how could I go back to my school and tell them that I had to turn down the prestigious fellowship they'd awarded me? My new boss answered the question for me in my second interview, when discussing my part-time status: "The hours vary throughout the year, and things get pretty quiet in the summer, so you can use that time if you want to make some extra money." Me: "Well, there is this thing I'm supposed to do next summer ..."
• And as it turns out, the part-time hours are one of the things I love about my job. In the immediate term, it means I can finish my final year of grad school and my second fellowship as planned. In the longer term, it means I have more time for all the volunteer things that I love to do, but that are so hard to squeeze in around a full-time schedule. But it's about more than just scheduling. As I have already discovered in my first week, the flexibility of my hours relieves a tremendous amount of the stress of working every day, and helps me to find that elusive work-life balance: I go to work when I am awake and rested, I get judged based on what I accomplish rather than when I clock in and clock out, I come home with plenty of time to take care of things around the house, and I can make time for friends and family with much more ease. It's a big step for me towards a new kind of lifestyle; one that is not built on rushing from place to place, but rather on making time for what matters most to me.

So I feel like this job has been prepared just for me, at this exact moment in my life. And what's more, I feel like I've been preparing for it over the past several months and even years, although I didn't know it. Where I've gone to school and my last job are obvious tie-ins; but so is the fact that my tech training and gadget geekiness let me have intelligent conversations about the tools we use in our office, or that the hours I spent and the skills I built researching and writing for papers this spring and my project report this summer are perfect preparation for the site visit reports and case studies I'll be responsible for in my work. Even living on a student budget this past year has been a preparation for me, odd as that sounds. When I look back on the amount of income I had this year, and the fact that for most of the year I was paying for my apartment by myself, I realize that I've been learning what are luxuries and what are necessities in my budget, and learning that I can live very, very well on much less than I've been thinking I needed. My part-time salary is actually an abundant gift.

This is one of those mountaintop moments for me. God has been hard at work clearing my mind and heart over the past year to be able to receive this gift and appreciate it. My joy is very full right now, and I can see so many amazing things both in my past and my future. I know that the path ahead will contain stressors and challenges as well as delights; but I am so thankful for the restful space in which to celebrate all the goodness around me.